Last time, we covered the big four Agendas. This time
around, I think we should talk about the minor Agendas in the game. Reportedly,
these Agendas will be fully fleshed out in the next SpineSpur book: Covenant. I
can’t wait. Until that book is released, we have to settle for the Generic
Agenda Bonus and fleshing them out with Thugs.
The Wilds: Monsters- human, animal and things in between
This Agenda is lucky that it has as many models as it does,
because those models have some serious character. Thankfully, the Agenda is
good enough that it doesn’t need too many Thugs.
Cerebeast –
The Cerebeast is a beautiful model, one of the few I like
but don’t own. I will pick him up, but only after my queue is empty. The
Cerebeast is a good Central Character for a force, because he’s great in melee,
can spray models with liquid flame, regenerates lost health during the end
phase and can produce Fear Tokens pretty easily. He can also boost Wild Dogs
and other beasts. I think he makes for a strong model to take even if he isn't your Central Character, able to take
out and dish out some serious damage. With the Spray attack, he isn’t
completely reliant on melee to be effective, unlike some models (Hack, I’m
looking at you). Even if you’re not going to make a Wilds Agenda force, the
Cerebeast is good model for painting and Open construction lists.
Handyman –
I’m not going to lie; I don’t like this model. Not because
of his rules, but because I don’t want to paint up a bunch of severed hands.
Yes, that’s how he got his name. Handyman is another one of those models where
he can be amazing in some situations, and lackluster in others. He’s very much
a model that requires a large force to distract the enemy while he gets into
position. If there’s plenty of hindering terrain, he can lay traps. If he can
catch a model Unaware, he can cripple them. He can make Fear Tokens by killing
people, and he needs those tokens. He can really mess with people using the
‘Playing Possum’ Fear Ability. If you’re going to take him, keep Handyman away
from combat the first few turns. Lay some Traps, sneak around the rear of the
enemy, then go to town. If you’re in the Shitlands or HellHeart, he’s not going
to be as effective as he would anywhere else. You’ve been warned.
Wild Dogs –
The poor dogs of SpineSpur have become totally feral. Unlike
the poor folks they prey on, they use numbers and speed to get what they need
(namely fresh meat). Dogs are great for bulking out a Wilds force, because
they’re cheap and you can put a ton of them out in a game. If you’re going to
use them, use them wisely. They need to be up front so they can focus on the
enemy, but there’s no model or Agenda Bonus to keep them from wandering around.
The Orphanage: Think of the children!
If you didn’t shudder a bit when you read Amy Brighteyes’
back story, you’re made of sterner stuff than me. The whole idea of kids living
in SpineSpur gives me some major willies. Not because I think that the kids are
innocent, but because of just how vicious they’d have to be to end up there in
the first place. To give yourself another thought that brain bleach (also known
as hard liquor) can’t get rid of, not only do some kids survive – no, think
about the ones that thrive in SpineSpur.
If you’re going to run an Orphanage Agenda force, get a good
number of Thugs. You’ll need them.
Amy Brighteyes –
Speaking of kids that thrive in SpineSpur, Amy’s got to be
at the top of the list. She’s an unholy terror of a model. She’s cheap, she
can’t be targeted easily, and the magic she uses can make Hack cry ‘Uncle!’.
The only good thing is that she only takes three hits (note, that’s ‘hits’ not
‘damage’) before dropping. Her magic is the worst kind of manipulation. Unlike
the Dark Faith, which requires things like killing friendly models or Corpse
Markers, Amy just needs to be in range. She can drop a Thug with a successful
roll, make Hack turn his chainsaw on himself and can hit a group with a bunch
of Bleed Tokens. If you’re going to use Amy, make sure to keep him in the
middle of some disposable models because once she uses a spell, everyone is
going to start gunning for her, and she can’t heal. Period.
Billy Burns –
If you haven’t already, wander over to the Comfy Chair Games
forums and get your copy of Billy’s card. I’ll wait.
Done? Okay, let’s get rolling. As you can see, Billy isn’t
much for melee. It’s a shame his enemies won’t get anywhere near him. If you’re
going to use the young Mr. Burns, start dropping his special Molotovs as soon
as you can; they’ll soften up the enemy as easy as you please. If you’re up
against some ranged combat specialists, like the forces of GOD, throw up that
Searing Shield until you can get away from them. If you’re really up that creek
without a paddle, let little Billy throw a tantrum and clear the area. All in
all, Billy is a solid, balanced model. The best part? You get him with Amy, a match made in hell.
Granny’s Helpers –
I have no idea what these little shits help Granny do, but
that’s not your problem. Your problem is going to be using them in combat. They
aren’t good for melee, which is the failing of this Agenda. The good news is that
they can get around quickly and can let loose with a ton of slingshots. If you
have to, use them to protect Amy from melee and give Billy ranged back up.
Blackbones Crew: Hired guns
So, before I get started, I just want to say one thing. If
I’m reading the background right, the Blackbones crew can be hired by anyone to
take out targets. If that’s the case, then why can’t these guys have a rule
allowing them to be included in any Agenda or other force build? Just wondering,
you know?
Anyway, let’s talk about two of SpineSpurs deadliest
assassins. These two bring some serious firepower to any party. Throw some
Thugs out to screen them and you can take on just about any major Agenda in the
book.
Booth –
How can you not love a guy that dual-wields a sawed-off
shotgun and a pistol? He’s a great mid-range hitter, able to plug models from
far enough away that they won’t be able to get in melee range before his next
turn. And, if no one can see him, he can turn Ghostly, allowing him to move
through terrain and catch enemies from behind. He can also lay some Traps down while he's getting into position. If you’re going to use him, be
crafty. Booth isn’t great in a stand-up fight, so don’t fight fair. Backstab
like a bastard and he’ll make back his points (and then some) every game.
Hidell –
Oh, boy. This is one big BAMF (Bad-Ass Mother-Fucker). Hidell is
the only model with a sniper rifle. If you can get him in a high spot with
clear lanes of fire, he’s going to dominate the board. Thankfully, the rules
don’t allow you to put models in high places when the game starts, or no one
would ever play a game without him. Now, because he needs to get in place, your
enemy is going to throw everything he can at him to stop him. The tactics for
Hidell are as follows: Find good spot, every turn do the following: Lock On,
Distance Attack, Reload. Rinse and repeat until there are no more models left alive.
Redemptionists: Paying for past sins
The two models in this Agenda are at two different ends of
the spectrum in terms of play style. Dante Hayte is close combat focused, while
Greygun puts a lot of lead into the air. If you want to find ‘good guys’ in
SpineSpur, this is as close as you can get. If you want to make an Agenda force
with these guys, try to find some ‘kinder’ looking Thugs.
Dante Hayte –
Dante is an interesting model. His pose is very passive and
static, while his abilities are very active. Dante is also a badass, with his
Rockhard ability, he can survive a fight with stronger foes. He can also use
his Strangler ability to take out Unaware Thugs and other Grunts. If you’re
going to use him, put him in the middle of group of Thugs; he’ll strengthen the
line and use his chain to knock down and/or drag elusive models closer to his
buddies. As a brief aside, you might want to grab him and Hack so you can use
the 'Hunting Hayte' scenario in the SpineSpur book. It’s a great way to introduce
your friends to the game.
Greygun –
The master of the double pistols, Greygun is a whirlwind of
bullets and pain for his enemies. He gets bonuses when a friendly model bites
the dust and can move and shoot like no one else in the game. When you’re using
Greygun, keep him moving and make sure he doesn’t get too far away from the
other members of your force. Another nice thing about this model is that just
before he goes down for the count, he can make one last strike against the
model killing him.
Carnalval: Lord of the streets
My mother always said that honesty is the best policy, so
I’ll be honest about Mr. Jiggles: I hate him. I hate the model, I hate his back
story and wish he would die in a fire (which is a doubly bad way to go in
SpineSpur). But, I’ll do my best to write up a fair review of him and his
buddy.
Mr. Jingles –
Ugh. Do you really want to use this guy? I mean, why do you
want to use a model of a fat dude in a G-string? Did a clown touch you at night
and now you have an attraction to them that borders on the disgusting?
Whatever. Mr. Jiggles need to have lots of Thugs in his force. He’s a Coward,
can have a selected Thug take hits for him and gets a bonus to attacks and
damage when he’s fighting a model being attacked by additional models. He can
move around quickly, divine secret weaknesses of enemies and is an all around
Sneaky Bastard. He also earns a Fear Token during the End Phase each turn. This
makes him a great model in larger battles, right in the middle of the action
(and some disposable allies).
Snuffman –
Man, what is it with these twisted creeps? Oh, wait, I’m
talking about SpineSpur. Anyway. Snuffman is another model that is pretty
nasty. He gets a bonus when fighting female models, is an expert scavenger and
produces Fear Tokens when a model dies in front of him. With his buzzsaw, he
can chop up enemies decently. If you’re using him, put him in the second row so
he can catch all the action and loot the dead.
Graveyard: Protectors of the dead
The Caretaker is a fairly good guy, but heaven help you if
you cross him or mess around on his domain. If he doesn’t take you out with his
trusty shovel, the Grave Golem will end you. There’s not much to this Agenda
right now, but based on the stories in the Threshold book, we’ll see Ghouls
soon. For right now, add some Thugs to the Caretaker and Grave Golem then sit
back and enjoy the show.
Caretaker and Grave Golem –
For the sake of simplicity, I’m going to write about both of
these models at once. You see, you can’t take just one or the other, you have
to take both. Not that you would want to have just one of them; they’re like a
Reese’s peanut butter cup – the chocolate is nasty without the PB and the PB
isn’t that good without the chocolate. And, without the Caretaker, the Grave
Golem wouldn’t be as powerful. The Caretaker can command the Grave Golem to
move a little faster, boost the Golem’s stats by absorbing Corpse Markers, and
highlighting targets for Distance Attacks. The Grave Golem also takes out
Undead like machine, boosting his stats while he does. Please note that while
the Caretaker and Grave Golem are Indifferent, they won’t work with models from
the Dark Faith Agenda. Also, there’s a scenario that pits the Dark Faith
against the Caretaker and his buddy, so you might want to shell out for these
two if you’re getting a Dark Faith Agenda Starter.
Church
of Metal: Highway to hell
The Church
of Metal has just one
guy, but more have been mentioned for the upcoming book. Oddly enough, this
Agenda isn’t too hard to make a 100 point list for using Thugs and Shattered.
If I get the chance, I may make some custom Shattered (“Groupies”) and Thugs
(“Bodyguards” and “Back-Up Singers”), but that is a project for the future.
Sex Star Six –
Okay, not a very kid friendly name, but what in this game
is? Sex Star Six is a good model, and not just in looks. This Gene Simmons
wanna be is a good support model, capable of boosting friendly models (but
boosts models of his own Agenda better), detracting from enemy models and able
to sling some minor damaging distance spells. He also carries a flamethrower
and long blade, making him a model that can fill any roll in a force. Need fire
support? Lightning Riff! Swarm of dudes heading towards you? Flamethrower!
Engaged in melee combat? Metal Scream followed by an ax to the face! Just admit
you’re going to guy already and save yourself the hassle.
There you are, folks. Next time, I’ll go through building
forces and all that good stuff.
